This article is about how do you know if a girl wants you to approach her? Are there signs that she gives to let you know you can approach her? I recently did a video on how to approach a girl without being a creep, but I didn’t talk about when. So, you guys, rightfully so, started asking me, how do you know if you should be approaching the girl? Because you obviously don’t want to enter a situation where she was clearly giving signs that she doesn’t want to be bothered.
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The first thing I want to talk about is, there are different scenarios for this. So, if you’re at a bar or lounge, girls are more likely to give you signs that she wants you to approach them. Basically, because a lot of people go to bars and lounges to potentially be talked to. Of course, not all girls want to be talked to. Of course, girls are taken and can go to these places, but it’s more likely that if a single girl goes and she wants attention, she will give you clues and signs. So, it’s easier to see there.
Now, there’s a lot of advice out there about what a girl will give or show in those kinds of environments. I’m going to quickly say it’s things like glancing at you, staying around your area for a long time. She’s near you and stays in that vicinity. It’s always the smiles! She not only throws glances, but she smirks at you. Signs like that can happen at lounges, bars, or social settings. But once again, you can find that advice anywhere and I quite honestly agree with most of it.
Greenlight Unless It’s A Red light.
But what I want to talk about today is more for cold approaches. At a Starbucks, or at a park, people aren’t always going there to find someone, but it can happen. Are there even signs when you are in those public locations that are more for cold approaches? Yes and no. So, my rule of thumb is, it’s always a green light unless it’s an obvious red light. What does that mean? That means, if girls are going grocery shopping, they’re not going to go there and make sure she glances at you and makes sure that she gives you a smile. They’re just going about their day.
Now, that doesn’t mean she doesn’t want to be talked to. It’s just not expected that someone will talk to them. And trust me when I say, women love the story! When they are able to say, a guy approached her at a coffee shop or a grocery store, and you guys really hit it off. A lot of the movies do that. So, don’t think that girls ever want that to happen. Girls just don’t want to be approached by creepy men.
Note: Not all women are friendly, though. Most women are, but there are women who will be paranoid no matter who you are. Some women can just be mean. It’s important to note this because it’s not always your fault.
Mind Your Approach
That goes back to my other video. What makes you creepy is your approach. So, as long as your approach isn’t creepy…friendly, kind, and ladies who are ready to be in a relationship will respond to you. They will. And if they don’t respond to you, if they give you a very cold response, that’s on them, not you. A lot of times, it comes from a history of not-so-great relationships or dealing with not-so-great men. So, no, that’s not about you, if you know you’re doing your best. If she decides to be rude to you, you don’t want that person in your life anyway.
So, when is a good time to approach? Most of the time. There are only a few observations that alert you not to approach. Specifically, there are only 3;
3 signs to not approach:
- When she’s wearing headphones
- If she’s in a group with other people
- If she looks like she’s very preoccupied and busy. Obviously, she’s in a rush, she’s not standing still, you can tell she’s a little scattered, it’s not a good time to approach.
So, those are the three, I guess, signs that are not a good time to approach
So, there’s no big rule on, “Here are the top five signs on when to approach.” I don’t want you to focus on that, because I’ve seen so many stories where girls didn’t really give a sign, but it just happened. When they’re approached by friendly people or men, they’ll respond. So, I want you more to focus on, as long as she’s not doing those three signs to look out for, go for it. You’ll never know. You cannot wait for the perfect timing, because that actually doesn’t exist in those kinds of environments.
When she’s wearing headphones
Now, there is a small exception to one of the “no go”s and that is…if she has her headphones in. You can ask her questions if you are very, very curious about something that’s around you both. That’s like if she’s wearing headphones and reading a book, but you saw, she’s reading a book that you really relate to and is very unique, it’s okay to tap on the shoulder and ask, “Sorry to interrupt you. But I saw you are reading this book. I rarely see anybody read it. Do you like it? What got you into it?” That is fine to do. I’ve seen it happen.
This happened to me before when someone has approached me with headphones in. But I wasn’t angry because he actually asked a question that is fair, and he was interested in it (if you’re curious, he asked about the planner on my table) Other than that though, you want to stay away from it usually, it means that people are in the zone, focused on their own thing.
She’s in a rush
When someone is in a rush, obviously, they’re focused on getting out and getting their things done. As long as she’s not frantically running around trying to find things, then you’re fine. But usually, you can tell when someone’s really busy, and also on the clock. She wouldn’t have time to stop and talk to you, nothing against you.
Not with her friends
You also don’t want to approach a woman with a group of friends. Sometimes, people want to challenge themselves and approach someone with friends. But the reason why I say no is because a lot of times if you approach a girl when she’s surrounded by people, she’s not being authentic. She’s thinking about everybody else listening in and potentially judging, and wondering, and worrying about what they’re thinking. So, I would just not suggest that.
Now, if you still wanted to try, I can create another video on that, because that’s a different kind of approach. But like I said, normally, unless you have other friends that can distract the other friends, but that would be odd because, in this situation, it’s more like an errand you do alone, but that’s a different story. Once again, just I would say, stay away from groups or else she’s just dealing with too many people, and she’s also not being completely authentic because she’s thinking about everybody else.
I hope this helps you guys in your approach journey and knowing when to approach a girl. I challenge you to get out there. What I want you to do is challenge yourself and take advantage of the environment to talk to ladies. Try it out because you’ll never know until you do.
The approach is obviously not just figuring out how to initiate or knowing when to do it, before any of that…you need to know where you should go. Which public places are your ladies hanging out at? This is extremely important or else you’ll just wonder aimlessly feeling defeated. Find out where your ladies are below:
Find out here!