This happens to every man at some point. Let me discuss what to do when you’ve had a good date, you’re excited about that great date, seems like you may have another date, but then when you text after the date, she just slowly stops responding. What do you do?
“Is there no girl out there for me?”
That’s what they feared…
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You Had A Good Date
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Let’s paint the situation with this. You had a good date with this lady, you were really excited, you feel like you connected with her, she’s laughing, you’re laughing, you spend at least an hour and a half, two hours or more with each other. And then at the end of the day, you even asked if she would want to do this again. You say that you want to see her again and she says yes. And if you don’t have her phone number already (because some people meet through online dating apps, so you don’t get the number right away), so you ask for her number.
She says, “Yeah, you can have my number.” So, you’re excited. And then after the date, you text her, she does text back, and she says, “Thank you so much for the date, it was really fun,” or “it was good meeting you.” So, you’re excited. But then you text her the day after casually and she texts back, here and there. And you maybe start to realize that texting is different than before. But you’re still hopeful because she’s responding.
Suddenly, No More Text Messages
As I’ve always said, if she’s responding, that’s a good thing because if she’s not interested, she could just point-blank stop. But then that’s what happens. You get hopeful, there is some texting back and forth, and then all of a sudden, you ask a question, and then nothing. You wait two days, three days, still nothing. And here’s the thing, you follow my advice from another video in regards to checking in. So, if she doesn’t respond, maybe you think she goes, which I talked about before, you check in with her.
Maybe something happened, maybe she just lost your text in the chain. So, you just check in and say how she’s doing. Or maybe you sent her a link to something that you recently saw that is related to what you guys talked about on the first date. Either way, you just do a very casual check-in. And then still, she doesn’t respond, she just stops responding. This is, of course, more frustrating because you met her.
Feels like ghosting
In my other video, I’ve talked about it, if someone just completely ghosted you, and many times this is when you haven’t even met her, it’s really different in that case, but this one is more surprising because it’s not surprising when you’ve had an okay date. We’ve all had those dates where it’s okay, you’re not too sure, maybe you can go on a date with her. But when she ghosted you, you kind of take it because you realize it’s not like you were that excited anyways, it’s not like she reciprocated a lot. But on this date, when you had a good one and she reciprocated, it’s very confusing.
Once you check in with her, she doesn’t respond again. What do you do? leave it be? text again? do you say anything else? Well, here’s what I have to say to that, and it’s a quick answer. You send one last text message, one last one, because at this point, there’s nothing to lose. At this point, you’re confused and by being honest and direct, you may help her journey too, so that she can be direct and honest with the next person. And I know we wish that she was honest with you, but sometimes it takes that one person to call someone out for their actions to start changing. So, even though she did do it with, you know that you’re probably making a difference in her life and the other guy’s following.
Send this text
When I say, send another text message, I don’t mean, ask how her day is or all of a sudden ask for the date. You don’t want to do that. If she didn’t respond to two of your texts, you don’t want all of a sudden say, “Hey, by the way, let’s plan our next date.” It’s obvious she hasn’t responded. I would suggest to send a direct honest but kind. We don’t want to be mean or assume or judge in a text message. You want to state what you’ve observed, which is that it’s obvious she stopped responding and that you’re surprised.
You can say that you’re surprised by that. Maybe you can say you’re disappointed, that’s up to you how you would describe it. But I usually would opt for saying just surprised. “I’m surprised that you have stopped responding just because I thought we had a really good date , I connected with you so well, and I was looking forward to our next date. But I’m hoping you can answer for me, was there something that I did wrong? Was there something that happened that I’m missing?”
Basically, asking for clarity, asking for closure (you can say closure if you’d like). And remember, you want the text to say that you accept it, you already know what her answer is, you already know that this is not going to move forward. But you just wonder if there’s anything she can provide because you also want to know if you did anything wrong. Just be that honest. Most women after that, they answer when my clients do this, most women will apologize because they had a crazy week, and they just couldn’t respond to you. Maybe they’ll give you another date but most of the time something has happened and they’ll be honest.
Now, of course, there’ll be some ladies who will not say anything at all, and quite honestly, hey, you tried, let it go at that point. We don’t know what’s going on with her but we also don’t want to judge and say that she’s a horrible person. We’ll just accept that you did all that you could, you wanted an answer and she didn’t give it to you. That’s your answer, now it’s clear to let it go.
Don’t be hard on yourself, just know something happened with her. She didn’t give you an answer, so you’re just going to move on. Be happy that you had a great time with her, and that’s that. So that’s it, guys. Just send that straightforward text. Ask for an answer. And I hope you get it. And make sure, by the way, guys, if you need any specific help for me to look over your text messages or anything.
It’s not always easy to find something interesting to talk about on a first date, but keep in mind that dates are supposed to be enjoyable. Have fun and keep the conversation. Have difficulty in keeping the conversation going? Learn how to ease the slow below: