This topic is about why girls give you one-word responses and what to do when girls gives you one-word answers. You know those answers just don’t go anywhere. It doesn’t give you anything to work off of. It’s really aggravating, right? You feel like you’ve spent all this time, and effort, and thought into what you’re saying, and you ask a question, but she not only doesn’t ask you a question, she gives you a one-word response. So, you don’t even know where to take the conversation from there and you get stuck, and at that point, it’s just irritating. You’re wondering, “Why do girls do this?”
The first thing before I get into what you can do when girls gives you one-word responses, I want for you to watch my video about when she’s not asking you questions back. I, in that video, already go over a really warm strategy to hopefully encourage her to ask you a question. That’s obviously a part of this topic. So, it is important for you to watch that video first. Once you do that and learn the strategy, then let’s talk about what to do when girls give you those one-word responses.
Have trouble getting dates? Download your free 5-steps to quality dates ebook below
Get your free ebook here
Get my dating secrets gathered from over a decade of being in the field (as a couples therapist, matchmaker, coach, and previous work as an eHarmony lead).
Don’t be Quick to Judge
The first thing I want to talk about is the why, right? Why do girls give these one-word responses? Quite honestly, I don’t know. Because I don’t know every single girl out there and what their habits are. But what I want to say is, don’t quickly judge. Don’t quickly say, “she sucks at conversations, she’s not interested me, she doesn’t care”, because the truth of the matter is, I’ve actually seen some people who are just awful texters.
They don’t mean to be but they just don’t know what they’re doing. This happens for men and women. Not just women, I’ve seen men do this too. They just don’t know. They don’t mean ill will. They don’t mean any malice or they’re not literally texting you these one-word answers while behind the scenes, they’re telling you, “I’m not interested in you, I don’t want to talk to you.” Because in reality, they could just …not match with you, right? They could just not respond.
The first thing I’ll say is no, there is no definitive answer to why these girls are doing it because everyone has different reasons. Know to be careful of very quick judgments — judging her, and letting it go, and thinking that she’s such an awful person. We want to make sure we don’t put so much blame and negativity onto these ladies that we don’t know their stories or any of their journeys. Keep reading to give the chance to understand what her story is.
Ask Open-ended Questions
So, what can you do? The first thing is to make sure you do so you can prevent girls who gives you one-word responses, and that is done by asking open-ended questions. I’ve seen it so many times where my guys will ask closed-ended questions, and it will lead to a one-word answer because that would make sense. When you’re asking someone like, “Where did you get that tattoo I see in your photo?” She says a store name, that’s it.
She just says that and that’s it. Of course, she’s going to answer in one word, because you’re just asking her where. You can’t expect someone to already expand, you can’t expect that. So, it’s important for you to make sure you ask open-ended questions. So, instead of asking, “Where did you get that tattoo done?” Instead, you’re asking, “What made you get that tattoo? What does it mean to you?” That way, she really is forced to expand on that answer. It can’t be a one-word answer. She’ll either answer or not. And if she doesn’t answer, you dodged a bullet.
At that point, she may still give you an answer with three or four words. So, you can tell, it’s still something that’s very short, and you can’t really get anywhere with that. So, what can you do from there? Well, after she consistently does that, after she consistently gives you just statements, one-word answers for three to four times (and this is only after you’ve implemented my strategy), here are the three things you can do.
Let It Go
One, let it go. Honestly, if you saw her profile and her pictures, and you already feel like it’s a kind of lukewarm match, just kind of not worth your time at that point, just let it go. So, if you’re not even feeling that initial big interest, there’s no point in continuing this conversation. At that point, you’re just dragging things along and you might not even be happy with what happens after. So, let it go.
Call her Out
The second thing you can do is call her out. Sometimes, ladies don’t even know that they’re doing this and it takes that one guy to tell them, “What’s going on here? I recognize this. I don’t think you can kind of get away with this.” Quite honestly, a lot of quality women love challenges and potential growth (when it is presented kindly) If not with you, she will learn for someone else. So, you’re actually doing not only yourself a favor, potentially, but someone else in the future.
What do I mean by calling her out? Being honest by saying, “I realize that with all of your responses, they’re very short or they’re one word, and you haven’t asked any questions back.” You make that statement. From there, you can either branch out two ways. You can ask her and say, “Is there even anything you want to know about me?” Or, you can say, “Are you interested in getting to know me?” It calls her out, right? You get an answer, either answer would be really great.
Quite honestly, what’s the worst that can happen? She doesn’t answer. But know this, she read it. If anything, she didn’t answer, it’s probably because she’s not so happy you called her out like any of us can be initially when someone does, but trust me when I say she will think about it afterward, think about her behavior, and how she wants to handle it moving forward. Now, she’s aware of that. I’m sure she’s not now changing the behavior with you, but you helped society. Not society, but I guess in that situation.
Meet in Person and Give it a Chance
The third thing you can do, if you don’t want to call her out, that’s fine. But let’s say, her photos are cute. Let’s say she’s pretty attractive. It doesn’t hurt to potentially meet her and see if she’s a good conversationalist in person. Because like I said in the beginning, some people are just awful texters. I’ve seen it actually many times where a person is awful with texting, they give one-word answers, but in person, they’re so different. They’re bright, they’re really excited to meet you, and they’re really good at conversing with you. If you see she’s doing this, but you also recognize, she seems like a pretty girl, it doesn’t hurt to potentially meet her and give her that chance, at that point, just transition. At that point, just transition to get the date.
Because once again, you have nothing to lose at this point. You really don’t. It’s only been four message exchanges, might as well try, because you never know. And how you transition is just by saying, “You know, I realize I’m not that great of a texter. I feel like it’s better to connect in person. Would you be down to just go for coffee?” And that’s it. There you go. See if she will go on that date with you, and I can tell you, there are girls who do that. There are girls who say, “Okay, let’s go for a cup of coffee,” because they’re not a good texter.
You want to understand
I’ve had clients come back surprised that after thinking she’s a horrible conversationalist, she is so great in person… but she admits her texting isn’t so great. At the end of the day, all we can do is try to understand each other, right? But you do need that motivation to understand her. You get frustrated mostly when girls gives you one-word responses because you don’t have a level of understanding. So, if you’re not even excited about her profile and the conversation, let it go. But if you potentially are because she seems great, and her profile is great, why not? Do the third choice.
But last not least, if you’re feeling bold, go with a second option and call her out. Because at the end of the day you either help the person after or for you, you get your answer, just be honest with her. Let’s all help each other grow, right? I’m pretty sure you want that for yourself. If you were doing something that a lady doesn’t like, you would hope she’s honest with you so you can get that feedback, and then change it for the next person in your dating journey.
Hope that helps you, guys. Go out there, go have conversations, and let’s hope she asks you questions and expands more.
You can prevent one-word and short responses if you know the best initial message that will get her intrigued and engage her in a real conversation. Find out here!