Today, we’re talking about timing. Answering specifically the question, when you should ask for her number?” This usually pertains to chatting online from an online dating app, or from Facebook or Instagram, which doesn’t matter. Either way, you haven’t really got her contact or an in-person date. You met her online, whether that be through social media platforms or online dating apps. Though it can be scary to take online dating to the next level, asking a girl’s number has to be done if you want to progress. It’s really important to know when is a good time to ask her out on a date or get her number.
I say “get her number” because that’s the way most of you guys are asking the question because you think that getting the number is done before asking for the date. Especially because you’re only connected through an online platform. It makes sense, but it is the same if it’s either scenario. Whether you want a number or an in-person date.
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When you should ask for her number
Approximately, I will say waiting about four to seven days is when you should ask for her number! As a general guide, if you have been exchanging multiple messages and are getting on well, it is the best time to take the next step. More than seven days, you’re really pushing it. Because if she’s been chatting with you consistently, responding really well to you for that time, and you haven’t made the move whatsoever, she may conclude that you just want to be online friends. She’s most likely going to start disappearing or perhaps turn her attention to another online dater. Women want you to make the move, they don’t want to wait that long to ask for her number because that could come across as disinterest.
If you’re too short with the timing, let’s say in one or two days, there is not enough rapport built to have her feel comfortable and secure enough with her decision of giving you her personal information. A number is a personal information. If you think it may not be a big deal, it really can be. There are plenty of times people who use personal numbers and start spamming them or send it off elsewhere. You really never know! People experience a lot of different crazy things. Don’t think that the other person is crazy, just because they think that giving out a number doesn’t mean too much. The perfect average is about four to seven days.
See If You Have a Connection/Necessary Rapport
Now, here’s what’s really important though, it’s not just about the number. It’s about what you two are connecting on. It’s about the depth of the conversation, the rapport that is built during this time. That’s what matters. I will tell you this, there have been people that have successfully went on a date after they’ve just been chatting for two to three days. Now, why is that? It’s because they can tell that there’s so much great stories, connection being had even through a messenger.
You know what I’m talking about when you actually experience that sort of connection. If you wonder “how do I know that there’s a connection?” You know. She responds to you very quickly, uses a lot of expressive typing (exclamation marks, punctuation, emojis), she asks you questions, and her response time is very fast (or just enough, she responds when she’s not busy).
You can tell she’s engaged in the conversation. She shares stories with you, already comfortable enough to open up and communicate what she thinks, her thoughts, and her stories, and just opening up to you in general. Now, if there is a high factor in that, meaning that she’s doing that consistently, and you are, too. That means you guys have great rapport and chemistry and you want to catch it at its high moment, high peak.
Know When to Transition to an Actual Date
I talk about this in my other post about how to actually transition to an actual date, because that’s the moment you know you want to transition. You want to keep the momentum going. So, if you have that, the two to three days is okay. However, if it’s a pretty normal conversation and you want to play it safe because you’re not too sure. You’re not completely confident that you’ve had the rapport built, then an average of four to seven days is great.
And that’s your answer! Quick, simple, four to seven days is when you should ask for her number. I’ve seen it too many times who asked too fast without any rapport being built, but then I’ve seen so many people second guess themselves and then they wait too long. The woman, then, just gets frustrated and doesn’t want to give you the hint anymore. Make sure you stick within those days and you’re good to go.
Learn the exact step-by-step from initial message to how to transition to the date below
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