3 Important conversation tips to keep the girl

It takes skill to know how to initiate a conversation with a girl and then keep the conversation going. Once you learn this, you won’t have to think about it. When you get the hang of it, I want you to remember the three very important conversation tips to keep the girl and continue dating her. Yes, there are strategies on how to keep a conversation going with a girl, conversation starters, and transitions. But these 3 conversation bases will make you a confident conversationalist. It’ll make your dating journey easier, feel like you’re on top of your game, and learning these conversational tips to keep her will surely make your dating journey a successful one.

These three conversation tips are the foundation, the glue, and it will help you in the short term and long term (no matter how long you have been dating). So I hope you read this thoroughly (or listen to this) and if you notice you don’t do any of this, it’s time to start making some changes! 

Subscribe to my channel to get new dating advice every week.

What Are The 3 Rules of Conversation?

Be Direct and straight-forward 

When it comes to conversations, being direct and straightforward can really help things flow smoothly. Some men are afraid to let the girl know their intent, with that being said I suggest don’t be afraid to make your intent known! Be direct in what you want, what you observe, and how you feel.  I’ve had many men ask me

“What does it mean when a girl does this? What does it mean when she said this?” 

I tell them…the only way you can really know is by asking her. I can give you a theory, but you won’t actually know your answer until you ask her yourself. 

Why may you resist being direct? For the fear of stepping on her toes, not wanting to pressure her, and not wanting to cross any boundaries. Mainly, you don’t want to be disrespectful. 

But, quite honestly, if you come to a point of understanding, you’re just going to get your answer. She won’t feel any of those things above. She’s not going to feel like it’s rude. You only want to make sure you’re not coming from a place of assumption and judgment. 

For example, let’s say a woman is texting a lot while you’re on a date. I wouldn’t’ suggest saying

“well, you know, you can leave if you want because I can see you’re texting a lot” 

That’s not a really well-received response :)…. Instead, you can ask “Hey, is everything okay?” and if she asks why, you may mention

“I noticed you’ve been texting a lot and I just want to make sure you’re good. Are you having a good time?”

That shows you’re understanding, it shows that you just care. You want to make sure you’re not wasting her time and she’s not wasting your time. 

 If you come from the place of trying to hear her out, there is no way you can go wrong. She won’t find you rude or disrespectful. And if she does? If she gets defensive because you asked for her thoughts and you want to understand her then that’s not the right person for you. Once again (I’m going to repeat this over and over), you do not want to assume or judge. You want to come from a place of understanding. 

 

 Get comfortable talking about yourself

One of the great ways to get a girl interested is when a man is comfortable talking about themselves. Let’s admit, Men do not want to talk about themselves but not talking about themselves is the biggest mistake I see. Men continuously asking their date questions, listening, and asking more questions. It’s great that you want to get to know the lady so much you keep asking questions, but you barely talk about yourself. And if you don’t talk about yourself, how is she going to get to know you? 

It’s best to lead and guide the conversation, then mention your own story along that topic. So if she talks about something that really resonates with you and you’ve had a similar experience, It’s okay to share. It’s okay to talk about it without her invitation. Doing so will allow her to be curious and hopefully, she will ask you questions about it.

Now, I do want to note, if you say things about yourself and she still has not asked you a single question on the whole date, It’s a red flag. So recognize that giving information about yourself is a good thing. Doing so will reveal the ladies who don’t have a genuine interest in your story. It becomes clear you want to let go of them. 

If you have trouble talking about yourself because you fear you may seem self-absorbed or that you’re cocky, that’s more of an internal mindset obstacle to personally overcome.

Then, it is about finding the strategies on how to speak confidently without feeling that way. And trust me when I say, I’m sure you’re not coming off as so……….because you’re not self-absorbed. 

 

Practice your listening and transition skills 

Another great conversation tip is to work on your listening and transition skills. This means not only listening to what the other person is saying but also being able to smoothly transition between topics.

Good listening skills show that you’re engaged and interested, while smooth transitions keep the conversation flowing naturally. Practice makes perfect, so don’t be afraid to work on these skills to become a better conversationalist!

You may say that you listen, but she doesn’t know that you’re listening. It’s important to show her you’re listening by validating her in the conversation, nodding, leaning in, or using vocal cues like “uh oh” or “hmm. Oh, that’s great.”

As for transition skills, it’s the ability to go from one topic to another, asking more about it with “tell me more about that” or “what does that mean to you?” 

When you’re looking to shift topics, consider preparing a small gift in advance, such as  lapel pin. Offering this thoughtful gesture can ease any awkwardness and act as a unique bridge to connect you both. You might say, “This is random, but I thought you might like this,” as you transition to something new.

Transitioning from one conversation topic to another, then hopefully it flows to talking about an activity or a date. I encourage you to practice your listening skills, showing that you are listening. Then, also, the transitions! Thank you so much for taking the time to read this week’s topic. Don’t forget the 3 Important conversation tips to keep the girl when you are on a date.